« Day 6: Going Home | Main | Large and Empty Spaces »
August 22, 2006
Oh, You Men
It's Jurvis' birthday today, and while I've managed to have a date for every single Valentine's Day since the eleventh grade, I've rarely had the opportunity to celebrate the day of a boyfriend's birth.
Panic-stricken, I asked two guy friends for some advice today over instant messenger.
Adrianne: Man, today is Jurvis' birthday.
Adrianne: I didn't really plan anything, what with all that California craziness.
Adrianne: What should I do?
Nick: Threesome!
Adrianne: Today's Jurvis' birthday. Thoughts?
Todd: Anal sex!
Christ. Overwhelmed with deviations, I went to the primary source. When the boyfriend himself was asked what he wanted, he replied: "chicken stuffed with cream cheese, wrapped in bacon."
The funny thing is, Nick and Todd were joking.
Posted by Adrianne at August 22, 2006 10:53 PM
Comments
you honestly think Nick was joking?
Posted by: Tamar ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.mismatchedparentheses.net/nav-commenters.gif)
at August 24, 2006 11:57 AM
We can't count how many people have done each. We'd have to ask, "For each of the items below, rate how likely would you be to go along if your boyfriend suggested it." Because it may be that more people have encountered anal sex, even though more people are more willing to try chicken with cream cheese and bacon.
Posted by: todd. at August 24, 2006 08:54 AM
Is she alone there? I'd be interested to see the survey data to see how many people have eaten chicken stuffed with cream cheese wrapped in bacon vs. how many have had anal sex. Of course, that wouldn't really determine whether the number of respondents was dependent on how many would admit to either.
Posted by: antonym at August 24, 2006 01:10 AM
Here's how it actually went down:
Adrianne: what's your favorite food?
Jurvis: um
Adrianne: #1 ALL TIME
Jurvis: um
Jurvis: it might be this dish jerusha made
Jurvis: chicken stuffed with cream cheese and wrapped in bacon
Adrianne: wao!
Then I demanded an anal threesome with said chicken breast. A popular request apparently.
Posted by: jurvis at August 23, 2006 09:13 PM
The end of this post makes much more sense once you find out that Adrianne thinks "chicken stuffed with cream cheese wrapped in bacon is way crazier than anal sex."
I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that she's alone there.
Posted by: todd. at August 23, 2006 04:06 PM
Wait, Nick and Todd were joking?
Posted by: antonym at August 23, 2006 12:59 PM
I should have known that all of those times I've made ridiculous Mathiowetz quotes my away message would come back to bite me in the anal sex joke.
Posted by: todd. at August 23, 2006 07:32 AM
Post a comment
Thanks for signing in, . Now you can comment. (sign out)
(If you haven't left a comment here before, you may need to be approved by the site owner before your comment will appear. Until then, it won't appear on the entry. Thanks for waiting.)